Title & Chapter Number: Razor's Edge Trilogy 3: A Love That's Blind 1/2
Author(s): - Author's Index
Website: Hith a Naur
Fandom: Tolkien
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I do not own LotR or any characters, lands, or items from the Tolkien world. They belong to their respective copyright holders.
Warnings: Slash, Twincest
Betas: Silvara, the most patient beta in existence, and to my 'Gamma' reader, Ilye. ^^
Cast: Elladan/Elrohir/Legolas
Timeline: Fourth Age
Spoilers: None
Summary: When the twins receive notice that Legolas has sailed for Valinor without telling them, they must decide how they choose to end their days in Arda.
Notes: This follows the "One Step Closer" trilogy. This trilogy will answer all the questions and more. ^^ There is a companion trilogy staring Haldir and Celeborn, since they made an appearance in "One Step Closer" and in "Razor's Edge." I will be posting "Before The Dawn" sometime next week, after all four parts of this trilogy have been released. I hope everyone likes the finale! Much thanks must go to Ilye for her Elvish butt-kicking and her kindness for checking up on my facts. ^^
Imladris - March 3rd, 120 of the Fourth Age
Elrohir yawned and stretched. It was nice to wake to silence. Glorfindel had finally beaten the evil inside him and now The Last Homely House was at peace. Well, as much as it could be. Ever since Thranduil came back from Glorfindel's mind, the two had not left the practice field. Every afternoon, they dueled. Every afternoon, Glorfindel would best the Mirkwood King.
Elrohir looked over at his twin's sleeping form. Elladan was sprawled across the bed they shared, his eyes vacant and a small smile curving his lips. His brother had not slept so late in decades and Elrohir was not about to rob his lover of that luxury. Elrohir walked to his wardrobe and began to slowly pull on his leggings, humming softly to himself. There was not much to do this day, perhaps his family would like a simple outing to the Bruinen for a picnic...
He was just about to choose his tunic when a stab of white-hot pain blossomed behind his eyes. Elrohir dropped to his knees, putting the heels of his hands to his eyes, crying out in pain.
"Elrohir?" came the half-awake, very startled voice from the vicinity of the bed.
"Ell... adan..." was what he managed to croak out before a wave of dizziness caused him to fall backwards. He was surprised to find the warm weight of his brother behind him and not the cold wood floor.
Elladan held his brother's trembling form, his face twisted into a mask of fear for Elrohir. "What is it, gwanunig?" He tilted his brother's head back so he could look into Elrohir's face. He gasped when unseeing mithril eyes gleamed back at him.
/Elrohir?/
/Arwen?/
/Aye, gwanur, it is me./
/Why would you contact me like this? I am going to have a terrible headache when we are done./
/Forgive me, Elrohir. I needed to speak with you as quickly as possible and a messenger would have take months to conduct a dialog between us./
/What has happened, Arwen?/
/Estel has passed on. Two nights ago, he let go./
/Oh, muinthel, I am sorry./
/I am sorry to have waited so long to tell you, but as you can imagine, I was too distraught to Farspeak. I am going to leave for Lothlorien in a few weeks. I wish to spend the last days of this life where I was happiest./
Elladan's eyes became panic-stricken when tears began to fall from his the metallic eyes. "Elrohir..." he whispered.
/Please, tell Elladan and Ata'da how much I love them./
/I promise Arwen. Melin lle./ Bittersweet sadness filtered through the connection he held with his sister, letting him know in a more intimate way that she loved him and that she did not regret her choices.
/Elrohir, there is one more thing I would tell you before I go./
Elrohir's brow furrowed, making Elladan bite his lip. /What, Arwen?/
/Legolas has sailed for Valinor. He left yesterday morning. He took Gimli./
/He couldn't have! He would have had to come through Imladris! Everyone comes through Imladris who seek Cirdan./
/He did not seek Cirdan. He simply left down the Anduin./
Elladan watched as Elrohir's eyes regained their matte grey color. "Elrohir?"
Elrohir pulled his frantic brother into a tight embrace, whispering into his shoulder as his tears fell freely. "Our foster brother is gone and our sister journeys to Lothlorien for the final time. She sends her love, caulen."
They held each other in somber silence, only occasional sniffs and hitched breaths could be heard. Finally, Elrohir pulled back and wiped his face angrily, then looked at the floor. "She also spoke of Legolas."
Elladan smiled at the mention of their estranged lover. "I have missed him so. I feel the pull of his thoughts all the time, I desire to have him near. Now that Estel has passed on, will he be returning to us?"
Elrohir shook his head. "No, gwanunig. Arwen sends news that he and the Dwarf, Gimli, have sailed for the Undying Lands. They set sail from Ithilien."
"But... he did not send us any news or word of his departure..."
"No, he did not."
"He left us?" The hurt Elrohir could feel through the bond with his twin nearly tore his heart apart.
"Aye, meleth, he is gone."
~*~*~*~
En Route to Valinor - March 3th, 120 of the Fourth Age
"I suppose this is a bad time to tell you that I get seasick."
Legolas rolled his eyes. "You couldn't have said something while land was still in sight, could you?"
"I was hoping that it wouldn't be a problem this time," Gimli replied, looking more than a little greenish under his beard. "Oh, I need a drink! Pass me that wineskin."
"That's only going to make your seasickness worse," Legolas reminded him.
"Ach, what's the difference? Sick a little, or sick a lot, I'd rather have wine!" the Dwarf roared with a laugh.
Legolas chuckled in spite of himself and handed Gimli the wineskin beside him. "Promise me that you'll use the *other* side of the boat when you become ill."
There was silence for a few minutes while Gimli had some wine and Legolas checked his bearings with the sextant. The Elf was making a slight correction to their course when Gimli spoke again.
"I still say you should have told those lads you were leaving."
Legolas sighed. "Elladan and Elrohir are no longer a part of my life," he said somberly without turning around.
"Ha! You might have yourself fooled with that hogwash, but I can see clearly. Eyes of a hawk, remember? Any fool can see that you're afraid to see them again."
The Elf turned and regarded his traveling companion with a skeptical eye. "After all you and I have seen together, what do I have left to fear?"
"Your feelings, Master Elf. You're afraid to give in to what you feel for them. You love them, that's plain enough. All the avoiding them in the world won't change that. And it won't make you hurt any less. Or them."
"What they have together will always outweigh what I could have."
"Of course it will!" Gimli countered. "They were brothers before they were lovers, and they'd still be brothers even if they were lovers no longer. But that doesn't lessen what they feel for you. Love isn't something as can be used up or parceled out like wine from a bottle. Why, my grandsire had three wives! And never did any of my grandams feel as though they were less than any other, not even Grandam Nethil, even though her marriage was forty years after Grandsire's second!"
Legolas looked out across the expanse of sea, as though the horizon held the answers to his concerns. It wasn't until he felt Gimli's hand on his lower back that he realized he'd been staring for some time.
"I'll say no more on't, except to say this. If you've a heart hale enough to befriend a Dwarf, then you've heart enough for those two fine Elf-lords. You just think on that, friend Legolas. And now, if you'll pardon me; I do believe that the wine has caught up with me. I'll be on the other side of the boat if you need me."
~*~*~*~
Imladris - January 25th, 122 of the Fourth Age
Elrohir whimpered as his brother thrust deeper into him, causing his body to tremble with the strain of their lovemaking. He gripped the pillow in his hands as he pushed back to meet the powerful movements, moaning his pleasure to his lover.
Elladan held onto his brother's hips, panting with need, whispering words of encouragement and love to him. He loved when Elrohir wanted to be taken forcefully and quickly. It was always powerful and their culmination usually left them breathless and limp. He could feel his release building, but he continued to refuse his brother contact. He would take his pleasure and then allow his twin. It was a sweet torture he had long ago learned his brother desired.
He could feel his brother moving faster, his groans becoming louder and he shivered with anticipation. Elrohir relished the feeling of Elladan coming in him, the simple act feeling like a possession. He was Elladan's, just as Elladan was his. Just like Legolas was once theirs... Elrohir pushed the thought away, focusing on his brother and their moment of pleasure.
Elladan tensed and let out a long, low growl as he filled Elrohir with his seed, feeling all his muscles going loose with release. How he loved this time with his twin. He remained still for a few moments, shuddering with the aftershocks of orgasm and then slowly pulled away from his brother's tense body.
He tenderly turned his brother on his back and took in the flushed and damp form of his twin. He had never seen beings as beautiful as Elrohir or Legolas in the throes of passion. Elrohir's chest moved raggedly, his hips moving slightly in his need. Elladan smiled at his lover and dipped his head down, taking Elrohir's cock into his mouth. He swallowed the other Peredhel, taking him as deep as he could.
Elrohir groaned, tossing his head back and arching into the contact. His brother's hot mouth made short work of his control and with only a few motions, Elrohir came in a rush, crying out his brother's name as he spilled down his throat. Elladan gingerly cleaned his twin up and moved to lay beside him, drawing the younger Elf into his arms and kissing his head lovingly.
The night deepened and their bodies cooled, making Elrohir shiver slightly. "Come," Elladan said, pulling his brother up out of their bed with him. "A warm bath is just what we need before sleep."
Elrohir nodded and padded after Elladan, feeling like an Elfling being lead as he was. Once in their bathing chamber, Elladan motioned for Elrohir to sit while he prepared the bath for them. "Elladan, you do not have to wait on me."
"I know," he said, smiling over his shoulder at his lover. "I want to, though." Elrohir had been quiet and moody since Arwen had contacted them, and it had grown worse after her death. Nothing short of their time in bed seemed to lighten Elrohir's spirit, making him forget for those brief moments about his aching heart. Elladan wished he could ease his twin's soul, but he couldn't. His own hurt too much to offer support.
He spilled some of the fragrant bath oils into the warm water and swirled it around a bit when Elrohir's lost voice floated over to him. "Almost two years now. He has been a distant thrum in our minds for almost two years."
Elladan sighed. "He was a distant thrum long before he set foot on those shores, Elrohir. He cut us off before that damned Quest..."
"But, we did not feel it as acutely as we do now. There was hope. He said that there was always hope..." He felt those cursed tears come to his eyes again. He was ashamed of how needy he sounded, knew it was not fair to burden Elladan with his pain when he knew his twin felt the exact same emptiness. "I am sorry, gwanunig."
Elladan reached out his hand from his position in the steaming water that smelled of lilacs and lilies. "Rest for a while with me, meleth-nin. Just for a while."
Elrohir nodded and stepped into the water, settling between his brother spread legs and cuddled into the protective embrace. They remained still and silent for some time before Elladan spoke.
"Have you given any thought to our final days? Shall we join our sister or our father?"
It was a question they had been avoiding for some time now, but their time was running short. Cirdan had sent word to the Elven kingdoms, informing them that a boat would leave in four years time -- and it would be the last. All those who remained behind would fade; they would not be able to journey to Valinor.
"I worry that we will not be allowed in Valinor... or if we are, that there will be a punishment waiting for us. What we have done is not usual in our kind."
"Ada and Ata'da accepted it. Why should the Valar punish us?"
"Elladan, Ada and Ata'da love us. They don't care if we had sheep as lovers so long as we were happy. The Valar... they are different. They may see us as a sin."
Elladan fell silent, pondering his brother's words. He had never thought of their love as something to be punished. It felt right, natural. He always felt safest and the most loved in his brother's arms. But, Elrohir had brought to light a valid point.
"I also fear Legolas," whispered Elrohir. "Even if they allowed us to be with one another, if it was accepted, we would spend an eternity with Legolas rejecting us. I don't know if I could stand living in such a situation. I love him, need him, but not as he is."
"Perhaps things would be different?"
Elrohir chuckled. "I doubt it. He has spent over a century avoiding us and he took off without so much as a by-your-leave. No, I don't believe things will magically change because he is in Valinor."
"I do not understand him, caulen."
Elrohir sighed. "He doesn't understand himself. Let us put this decision off until we speak with Ata'da, Thranduil and Glorfindel. They may be able to show us an angle we have not seen." Elrohir turned in his brother's arms, a smiling spreading on his face. "Now, wash my hair so we can get back into bed. I want to curl up in your arms and drift off."
Elladan laughed and reached out for the ceramic pitcher to wet his brother's thick sable tresses.
~*~*~*~
Tirion - January 25th, 122 of the Fourth Age
Legolas tipped his head back and let the waterfall wash the last of the sandsoap from his hair. He could have bathed in his home, alone in the low candle light, but he had been driven by a restlessness into the woods of Valinor. He sat down upon a stone outcrop near the falls, enjoying the light spray, his troubled thoughts drifting to two identical sets of soulful grey eyes. Thoughts of the twins had plagued him most of the evening.
He was tired and he was lonely. The Mirkwood Prince had fled into the dense woodland early that afternoon when he realized that the looks he was giving Gimli were beginning to be *more* than friendly. He knew then he had to get away from everyone for a while.
It had been so long since he had taken a lover. As the Elf stretched his tense muscles, he tried to remember his last bedmate. Ah, yes. It was that Sinda Elf, Saelbeth. That relationship, if one could call it such, had lasted only a few years. After Saelbeth, though, he had given up the idea of sharing his life -- or his bed -- with anyone. When had that affair started? Shortly after he came to Ithilien... perhaps a century ago. His celibacy had never bothered him before, and he rarely indulged in self-pleasure. It always left him feeling worse when he was through.
But, on this night, he felt awash in desire. He felt needy and wanton. It was on this night that Legolas wished he had kept a lover. Instead, he could only reach down and take his erect member in his cool hand and close his eyes, remembering the gentle touches of Elladan and the soft words of Elrohir.
Where had that come from? The Elf shivered, feeling as if the twins were near... But, he knew they weren't. He had left them in Middle-Earth, snuck away like a bandit. He opened his eyes and looked up, watching the stars glitter. His hand stroked himself more firmly, giving in to his growing desire.
After fighting his memories for so long, Legolas finally allowed himself to think back on his time with the Peredhil. He imagined that he could feel Elrohir cradling him while Elladan worked his mouth around the Sinda's arousal. The younger twin would stroke his chest and kiss his shoulder and neck, whispering endearments to him and to Elladan. Elladan's hot mouth would plunge down on his shaft, and Legolas would look down and see the elder twin's eyes staring back at him, sending shivers through his body.
Legolas moved his hand faster, pretending that he could feel Elladan behind him, filling him, pressing his cock into the Sinda while Legolas gripped Elrohir's hips, pushing deeper into the Peredhel, hearing his impassioned cries. Elrohir knew how much his moans and sounds of ecstasy drove Legolas wild, and he used that to every advantage. Legolas thought back over their years together and could almost hear those cries, those moans, calling to him from a hundred years ago and a thousand miles away. The warm liquid gushed over his hand as his orgasm caused flares of color to erupt before his closed eyes and his body to spasm with each wave of pleasure.
"Er merinyel," he whispered to the night, willing his words to find their target. The blonde cleaned himself up and drifted off to sleep under the stars, no less conflicted than he began.
~*~*~*~
Imladris - January 30th, 122 of the Fourth Age
Celeborn let out a loud laugh as Glorfindel pulled Thranduil under the water. They had been putting off this picnic because of one reason or another for nearly a year. Finally, there were no more excuses, and the Elves could enjoy this day together. Haldir lay with his head on Celeborn's lap, his eyes at half-mast with a drowsy contentment. Orophin dove under Glorfindel and yanked the blonde below the surface while Melpomaen dunked Rumil.
Elladan reclined against his brother, smiling at the happy scene before them. This was the most peaceful the group had been in years. Elladan welcomed the feeling of warm love that bound the members of The Last Homely House to each other. Elrohir shifted behind his twin and turned his troubled gaze to Celeborn.
"Ata'da?"
Celeborn turned his dancing gaze onto his youngest grandson and raised an eyebrow at him. "Why so pensive, Elrohir?"
"Will you and Haldir sail? Thranduil has already told us he plans on going, we know Glorfindel will go... Melpomaen will go wherever Rumil goes and Rumil will follow his brothers anywhere. So, it all comes back to you and Haldir. Will you two go to Valinor?"
The Sinda ran his hands through his lover's hair, smiling down at the Elf who had, at some point, slipped into reverie. He looked back up at Elrohir and nodded. "Aye, we will be traveling the Sea. It is the order of our lives. There is nothing else here for us." Elladan nodded and turned his eyes back to the river while Elrohir's remained locked with his grandfather's. "What are you thinking of, Elrohir? Are you and Elladan thinking of choosing Arwen's fate?" His face became grave and serious, all gaiety fleeing.
"We have thought about our future. We fear going to Valinor. We are afraid that the Valar may judge our choices and punish us for our love." There was no point in hiding their thoughts from Celeborn and Elrohir really felt there was no reason to hide. He wanted his grandfather's advice.
"Elrohir, if you choose the fate of Man, you and your brother would eventually be parted in death. We do not know where Men go when their time on Arda is over, you have no guarantee that you and your brother would be together if you remain and died here. If you sail, you at least have a chance." Celeborn did not want to leave his daughter's children behind. His family would never forgive him.
Elladan sat up and turned to face both his grandfather and his twin. "We do not feel we have done anything to warrant judgement."
"I agree. We love who we love and blood rarely matters when it comes to the whims of the heart. I do not believe that the Valar are so narrow-minded in their views. Your love is not the true fear you have, is it?" He pinned them in place with his piercing eyes, demanding the truth from them -- not half-truths that did not further the situation.
Elladan shook his head. "Legolas..."
"Legolas has his own heart to sort out. You have bonded. That does not change. He has had much time to decide what course he must take. But choosing death over facing an old love is not a very wise choice -- nor is it one I would expect two warriors to take." Celeborn shifted, laying out beside Haldir and pulling him close. "Trust me," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "Love is too precious to let go... it's worth saving..."
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