Title & Chapter Number: Hearts in Lothlórien 6/10
Author(s): - Author's Index
Fandom: Middle Earth
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. They are the work of the Masterful Tolkien. Tolkien's the man! Also, I shamelessly stole, er, borrowed the series title from Stephen King's "Hearts in Atlantis." And the chapter title from Simon and Garfunkel's "The Sound of Silence." This story, however, is all mine. I make no money off of this and probably should be working on something where I might actually make some money…but here ya' go.
Warnings: Slash, (DUH!)
Betas: Salina
Cast: Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, Boromir, Sam, Frodo, Merry, Pippin and Galadriel.
Timeline: TA-AU
Spoilers: None
Summary: Frodo's soul is being torn apart by the Ring. Can Galadriel offer him comfort?
Notes: I haven't really done any serious Frodo fics before and also this one was a bit difficult due to the fact that there already is a huge Frodo/Galadriel moment in the book and the movie. I thought this might make a nice lead-in to the Mirror scene. Thanks so much to Salina and Rebecca for the beta and love.
Until His Tears Run Dry
~*~*~*~
"'Yes,' said Frodo; 'but whatever came into my mind then I will keep there.'"
-- The Fellowship of the Ring, JRR Tolkien~*~*~*~
He's looking from side to side in what appears to be a bit of panic. There is a heaviness in the air around Frodo as he walks swiftly through my gardens searching for whatever it is he is missing. I know what the weight is he carries around his neck, but this heaviness I feel now seems to be much more than the weight of the Ring. He is distressed, but about what I cannot tell.
He is rushing by so quickly I barely have time to call out to him.
"Frodo."
His head whips around until he is facing me, his hand going automatically to where his sword would be, though he carries no weapon. It takes him a moment to relax and drop his hand down to his side, but his expression of panic has not gone.
"What is it you are searching for, Frodo?" I ask him.
"I'm only trying to find Sam. I thought he might be in the gardens."
He is watching me with wary eyes.
"I have not seen him," I say. "Is it a matter of great importance, or do you perhaps have time to walk by my side?"
He is indecisive for a moment and then I see his shoulders drop in resignation. "Of course, my Lady."
I approach him slowly, as one would a scared animal. I lift my hand to brush his cheek lightly in a comforting gesture but he flinches and pulls away. I drop my hand to my side and begin walking. Frodo falls in step beside me.
"Why do you seek Sam out so urgently?" I ask.
I watch out of the corner of my eye as Frodo flexes his jaw in anxiety.
"I just need to be near him," he answers in a whisper.
I am glad that though Frodo seems to be pushing away the rest of his companions, he still seeks Sam out as a source of comfort.
"I wasn't aware that Samwise ever left your side," I say, trying to lighten the mood.
Frodo glances quickly at me and then looks away, but not before I perceive the anger in his eyes.
"He does *not* leave my side. Or at least not by choice." His voice drops and I can almost taste the bitterness on his tongue. "Not until we arrived here."
"But you are safe here, Frodo. Sam need not worry about you as long as you are inside my lands."
"I am not safe here," he replies. "So long as I carry the Ring, I am safe nowhere."
The words are harsh and I wonder what has set him in such a foul mood.
"Tell me, then, what is it that you fear here in the Golden Wood?" I truly do not know. Though the road ahead is a dangerous and perilous path, I had hoped that the Ringbearer might take some rest and peace while in my land.
"Everything," he says, and then pauses for a brief moment. "And nothing."
He looks so distressed that it takes all my will power not to gather him up in my arms. But I know he would flinch at my touch.
"There are voices everywhere I go," he continues on. "I don't know how you do it. I feel like I can hear the voices inside everyone's head. All their doubts and fears. I close my eyes and try to take rest and…"
His eyes have fallen shut and he has stopped walking. I turn to face him.
"And what, Frodo?" I press.
His answer is so soft that I barely hear him. "I hear it in the wind, in the trees. There is a voice that shows me how much they doubt me. And not just the Fellowship."
He raises his gaze to me now and I see the torment that is going on inside his soul. "Your people too, my Lady. I can tell when they are in the trees above me, watching me. I know what they think about such a task being appointed to me. And try as I might, I cannot quiet the voices."
My breath catches as he says this. I know how much he doubts himself already, but now he hears the voices of the others as well.
"Frodo, that is the Ring. Your companions have faith in you. The Ring is trying to poison you, to drive you away from them. You mustn't let it."
"I have seen it in their eyes," he cries out, his voice rising with panic. "It may be the Ring speaking but it speaks in truth. I can feel it."
"No, Frodo," I insist, forcing my voice to sound harsh, to make him understand. "You are safe here in Lothlorien. The Ring knows this. It is attacking you the only way it knows how. You must not listen to it. It will drive you mad."
Frodo looks down now and I follow his gaze. He is looking at his hand. He has raised it halfway so it hangs just inches away from his chest. Frodo's hand shakes and I see him forcing his fingers to close into a fist.
I know what he is doing. He is trying to fight the urge to take the Ring into his hand, to touch it. I reach out and wrap both my hands around his raised one, holding it steady. I see his shoulders relax and an audible sigh escape him.
This time he welcomes my touch.
"Frodo," I say, and wait until he raises his eyes to meet mine.
"You should be wary at all times, but you should put faith where faith belongs. There are some in this Fellowship whom you can always count on. Always."
He looks as though he wishes to say something but he cannot get it out.
"There is only one power greater than that of the Ring, Frodo. It is called Love."
Tears form in his eyes. "I know this," he chokes out, barely holding the tears in. "But what if it isn't enough? What if the day comes when Sam can no longer quiet the voices for me?"
A single tear runs down his face.
"What if the day comes that I start to hear Sam's voice? And what if he doubts me as well?"
The thought is too much for the Ringbearer and his hand shoots upward and grabs the chain that bears the Ring. I reach for Frodo's hand. He has a tight grip but I relax his fingers until he lets go of the chain. I pull him to me and feel that same hand grasp hold of my gown as the tears begin to fall.
I have wondered about showing Frodo my Mirror, showing him the true importance of being a Ringbearer. I do not know if he can handle the reality of just how much he has left to endure, including the near certainty that he will lose all that he loves. But I feel he must see all this to understand what it is he must do.
But for now, all I can do is hold him until his tears run dry.
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