Title & Chapter Number: This Side of the Anduin 5/6
Author(s): - Author's Index
Fandom: Middle Earth
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. They are the work of the Masterful Tolkien. Tolkien's the man! This story, however, is all mine. I make no money off of this and probably should be working on something where I might actually make some money…but here ya' go.
Warnings: Slash, Drunken behavior, Humor, Mild Angst
Betas: Larian & Fireheart
Cast: Elrond, Glorfindel, Aragorn, Halbarad, Gandalf, Haldir, Legolas, Elladan and Elrohir
Timeline: TA-AU
Spoilers: None
Summary: It's the Midsummer Feast in Rivendell. Everyone gathers for the celebration. The twins plan mischief.
Notes: This is a Waters-of-Cuivienen Fest challenge which read…"Plot: Elves and mischief abound at the annual Summer Festival at Rivendell/Imladris. Describe." I meant for this to be a short little ficlet. The twins weren't happy until everyone had gotten laid. And Glorfindel and Elrond wanted to be a bit angsty, despite that I was really going for humor here. I have warped the characters into a bunch of frat boys, so be forewarned on that. Also, this is my first time writing Elrond, Glorfindel, Haldir, Halbarad and the Twins. Many, many thanks and praises to my betas, Cristine and Larian. And also thanks to my superhero leader, ConspiracyX, for answering my every beck and call. This one's for Menel.
Fancy A Go
Gandalf went to retrieve the fireworks with help from Glorfindel.
Legolas took up Gandalf's seat on the low bench next to Lord Elrond. He continued to rub his head where he had bumped it when Gandalf had thrown him to the ground.
"I think I need a healer," Legolas told Elrond.
"I believe that Aragorn is a healer," Elrond told him.
"I am," Aragorn called out, though he didn't move from his prone position on the ground.
"Can't you look at it, my Lord?" Legolas asked, batting his eyelashes at the Lord of Rivendell.
Elrond sighed, admitting defeat and motioned for Legolas to turn around. Legolas did, and groaned loudly and over-dramatically when Elrond started sifting through his blonde hair.
"Does this hurt?" Elrond asked, rubbing his fingers over a large lump that was forming on the back of Legolas' head.
Legolas flinched and pulled away. "Yes."
"You have a nasty lump there," Elrond told him.
"Oh. Perhaps you should take me back to the house and get something for it," Legolas suggested expectantly.
Elrond chuckled. "I don't think that will be necessary, young Prince. All you need is a good night's rest, I assure you."
Legolas looked heart-broken. "Well, I still feel a bit dizzy. I think I should at least put my head down." And then, without asking the Lord of Rivendell for permission, Legolas scooted over closer to Elrond and put his head down on his shoulder.
Elrond shook his head, but didn't move the younger Elf off of him.
Haldir, extremely distressed by the amount of attention that Legolas was giving Elrond, decided that the time had come to form an alliance. He moved over to where Aragorn was sprawled out on the grass and sat down.
"Aragorn?" he whispered.
"Hmm?"
"I think our young Prince is spending a little too much time batting his eyelashes at our gracious host," Haldir said quietly, hoping that none of the others heard.
"Your point?" Aragorn asked.
"Aren't you concerned?"
"No."
Haldir looked down at Aragorn. "Really? Why not?"
"Legolas is a big boy. He can do whatever or *whomever* he wishes."
"It doesn't bother you?" Haldir was aghast.
"Not at this moment."
"I don't…why not?" he repeated.
Aragorn sighed. "Because, Haldir, I'm pleasantly drunk right now." Aragorn grabbed the Golden Elf's arm and pulled him down onto his back. "Now be quiet, you're being a buzzkill."
Haldir, whose head was hurting immensely from trying to wrap his brain around Aragorn's words, decided that he could worry about Legolas and Elrond after the fireworks.
The twins, in an attempt to distract themselves from Legolas pawing their father, had moved over to sit on the ground next to Halbarad, one on each side of him.
"Enjoying yourself?" Elladan asked him.
"Like our ale?" Elrohir asked him.
Halbarad looked from one twin to the other, trying to remember which one had been swatting his ass all evening. Elladan put a hand on Halbarad's thigh and suddenly he remembered. He scrambled to the side, only to feel Elrohir's hand on his lower back.
"You are far to tense, Halbarad," Elrohir breathed in his ear.
"I don't think he's had nearly enough to drink tonight," Elladan commented.
Both twins put an arm around Halbarad's shoulders.
"Do you know the best way to watch Gandalf's fireworks?" Elrohir asked.
Halbarad shook his head, unable to speak with two sets of eyes roaming his body freely.
"Like this," Elladan whispered and then proceeded to pull Halbarad down onto the ground. The twins had slipped their arms around his back and their legs under him, so that Halbarad lay nearly completely on top of them.
He knew this was not a good thing. Inside of him, a little voice was screaming at him to move. The only problem was that Halbarad *had* had nearly enough to drink, and was warm and sleepy, and didn't really want to move. After all, what could be the harm in laying here like this, with all these other people around?
It was then that Gandalf and Glorfindel returned carrying two large bundles of fireworks.
Gandalf motioned in the direction of the bench. Somehow Legolas had convinced Elrond to give him a head massage. Gandalf smiled. "Looks like we came back before things got *too* out of hand, at least."
Glorfindel did not smile back.
~*~*~*~
"I really can't dance," Halbarad protested. "And there isn't any music anyway."
"The music is in here," Elladan told him, tapping the Ranger's chest.
"And there's two of you," Halbarad said, trying to sit back down. But the twins had a hold of both of his arms and were dragging him to the center of the open glade.
"I…I don't know…know what…to do," Halbarad stammered.
"We can teach you," Elrohir whispered in his ear from behind.
Elladan was in front of Halbarad, circling his arms around the Ranger's neck. Elrohir had come up behind Halbarad, placing his hands on the Ranger's hips.
"I'll just move you like this," Elrohir told him, pressing his body flush against Halbarad's and moving him forward a bit. "Then you move Elladan along with us."
Halbarad stood completely still, unable to believe that Elrohir was pressed against his backside like that. Elladan took Halbarad's arms and placed them on his hips.
"When he pushes," Elladan instructed, "You pull."
Halbarad nodded, swallowing a dry lump in his throat. Elrohir pushed up against him from behind and on instinct Halbarad pulled Elladan flush against his front. He heard Elladan moan and closed his eyes, feeling like he needed to lay down.
This was *so* not good.
Legolas, who had been acting the part of the poor, injured innocent, decided that dancing would be more fun than playing hurt.
"My Lord," he said, bowing low before Elrond, "might I have this dance?"
Elrond looked surprised. "Legolas, I haven't danced in ages."
Legolas scoffed, "A handsome Elf like yourself, I don't believe that. It certainly can't have been ages."
"Yes, ages, since Celebrian left."
"Oh," was all that Legolas could think to say.
"I appreciate the invitation, young Prince, but I fear I could never keep up with you," Elrond smiled at him.
Legolas leaned in a bit too close to the Lord of Rivendell and whispered, "Then I shall go slow." Then the young Elf grabbed Elrond's hand and pulled him to his feet.
"Legolas, really…" Elrond started to protest, but Legolas cut him off.
"It's the MidSummer Feast. You *have* to dance, my Lord. You are setting an example for the rest of your people."
Elrond gestured to his sons, who were doing a bit more of grinding than actual dancing, with Halbarad in between them. Halbarad had thrown his head back onto Elrohir's shoulder and seemed to be rather enjoying himself. "I do not need to set any example for my people. I doubt very much they would notice."
Legolas chuckled and slipped his arms around Elrond's neck. "Come now, Lord Elrond, I'll even let you lead."
Elrond sighed and put his arms around Legolas' waist. "One dance. That's all."
Legolas smiled wickedly. "That's all, hmm? We'll see. We'll see."
Gandalf had been watching with fascination at the slow dance of seduction that Legolas had been playing with Lord Elrond all night. He knew that the young Prince had no idea what he was asking for. This was even more entertaining then the time that Elladan had insisted that he could fly, jumped from a tree and broke his leg.
Gandalf chuckled and turned to face Glorfindel. "Fancy a go?" he asked the Elf.
Glorfindel crinkled up his brow. "A *go*?"
"A dance, Glorfy. My, you've had a bit much to drink tonight, haven't you?"
Glorfindel shook his head. "No and yes, in that order."
Gandalf poked Glorfindel in the shoulder. "Dance with me, Glorfy."
"No thank you, Gandalf."
"You've been sullen and pouty all evening," Gandalf told him. "Now enjoy yourself." And Gandalf poked him in the shoulder again.
"I respectfully decline," Glorfindel said crossly.
"And *I*," Gandalf poked his shoulder again, "respectfully insist."
Glorfindel pushed Gandalf's hand away.
Gandalf poked him in the shoulder.
"Stop poking me!" Glorfindel cried.
"Dance with me and I will."
"You're a mean, nasty, old man," Glorfindel grumbled, as he rose to his feet.
"I am not. I'm persistent."
"You're not allowed to talk while we dance," Glorfindel said, slipping his arms around Gandalf's waist. "And I'm leading. Now be quiet."
~*~*~*~
"Haldir?" Aragorn asked.
"Hmm?" Haldir mumbled, still laying on the ground, eyes closed, arms folded across his chest.
"Dance with me."
"Can't. Am dancing with Legolas."
"No, you're not. You're laying on the ground."
Haldir opened his eyes and looked up at Aragorn. "Not right now. As soon as I get up, I will be."
"No, you won't. He is already dancing with someone."
Haldir struggled to sit up. He blinked his eyes until they focused. There was Legolas with his head on Lord Elrond's shoulder and Lord Elrond with his nose buried in Legolas' hair.
"Well, that's not good," the Golden Elf muttered.
Aragorn sighed, "Even Halbarad is dancing. You *have* to dance with me, or we'll be the only two losers who aren't dancing."
Haldir glanced at Aragorn and shrugged. "Alright then, but I'm leading."
~*~*~*~
"My Lord?" Legolas whispered.
"Hmmm?"
"You said one dance. Either we have had several dances or this was a really long dance."
Elrond smiled into Legolas' hair. "I think it's been a really long dance."
"Oh. Well, do you still say 'only one dance and that's all'?" Legolas lifted his head from Elrond's shoulder and meet the older Elf's gaze.
Elrond caught his breath at those blue eyes piercing him. "Legolas, I doubt people ever tell you 'no', do they?"
"Sometimes. But not very often," Legolas smiled. Then he leaned in toward Elrond's lips.
For a second, Elrond forgot to pull away and felt the first brush of those soft lips on his own. Then he remembered his dignity and his age, and pulled back from Legolas. Hurt was etched all across those fine features of the Mirkwood Prince.
"Legolas…"
"Please, my Lord, I need…I need…"
"Legolas, I am flattered. But I cannot."
"I hurt for you," Legolas whispered, pressing his body flush against Elrond's, so that the older Elf could feel just how much Legolas did *hurt* for him.
"You are intoxicated, Legolas."
Legolas met Elrond's eyes. "If I am intoxicated, then it is by you."
Elrond lost his voice for a second. Legolas seemed so sincere. So needy. So…and then Legolas burst into giggles, slumping against Elrond and clutching at the older Elf's robes. "Oh, Valar, I almost did it too," Legolas gasped in between giggles. "If I wasn't so *intoxicated*," and more giggling, "Oh, but I *do* want you."
"Well, you can see how giggling about it is not going to get me into bed, yes?"
Legolas nodded against Elrond's chest but continued to giggle.
Gandalf, still dancing with Glorfindel (in silence as the Elf had ordered) and still watching Legolas' juvenile attempt to seduce Elrond, figured that Legolas giggling probably meant that the seduction was a failure.
He spun Glorfindel around twice, until they came up beside Legolas and Elrond.
"Care to switch?" Gandalf asked Elrond.
Elrond raised his eyebrows at him. "You wish to dance with me, Gandalf?" he smirked.
Gandalf smirked back. "No, not you. Him." And then Gandalf grabbed Legolas by an arm and pulled him away.
Elrond and Glorfindel were left staring at each other.
"Well, then, " Elrond said. "I suppose we could give it a go."
"A go? What is with you people tonight?" Glorfindel muttered.
"I beg your pardon?" Elrond asked.
Glorfindel turned red and looked down at his feet. "Nothing. Sorry, my Lord."
Elrond sighed. "Glorfy, would you like to dance with me?"
Glorfindel was still red in the face, but he managed to look up at Elrond. "Do you lead? Because I do, and I can't dance otherwise."
"Really? I didn't know that. How come I didn't know that?"
Glorfindel shrugged. "You've never asked me to dance before."
"Well, that was a mistake. But I'm asking you now."
Glorfindel met Elrond's eyes. "It would be my honor, my Lord."
"I should think so," Elrond teased, sliding his arms around Glorfindel.
Glorfindel put his hands on Elrond's hips and turned an even brighter shade of red than before.
Elrond leaned forward and whispered in Glorfindel's ear. "Your face isn't going to stay that color all night, is it?" he asked.
"I hope not," Glorfindel whispered back.
Glorfindel and Elrond enjoyed a very, *very* long dance. So long that they didn't even notice when they were the only two people left in the glade.
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